Penelope Cruz

Penelope Cruz
C/O William Morris Agency
151 El Camino Drive
Beverly Hills, CA 90212

Dear Penelope,

Thank goodness you are not related to Tom Cruise… He is a little bit crazy, don’t you think? That whole Scientology thing? Wow. I hope you’re not into Scientology, because if you are, golly gee – I might have well just put my foot in my mouth.

I rarely watch Oprah, but i was watching it that time Tom Cruise was on. Before all that media hype – ages ago. I knew immediately that Tom Cruise was crazy. It was actually painful to watch. I was embarrassed for him – I had to turn the TV off, it was so awkward. I did a bunch of research on the Internet about Scientology and it’s bizarre. An alien genocide leaking ghosts onto Earth that must be “audited” away by paying money? Sounds like something a science fiction writer would invent. Oh wait, Scientology was the brainchild of Ron Hubbard – the author of Battlefield Earth. John Travolta started in the movie. He’s a big Scientologist. See the connection? Wow, that story went full circle. Amazing.

I’m sure you get all sorts of letters, so I’ll finish mine here. It would really make my day if you could send me a response.

You’re my hero!

Jeremy David